"Doctor I have brought in my pet Flamingo"
"Oh I see, now what seems to be the problem?"
"Well, it just can't stop jumping up and down..."
She then throws the plush toy in the up and up into the swirling ceiling fan, causing it to fly and land across the room with a thump.
"Well, it seems you no longer have a problem. It's dead".
****************
Why I can't play the patient:
"Doctor!!! Doctor!!!! My penguin is dying!!!! DO SOMETHING!!"
I then shake the poor Miss C out of her wits...blame it on General Hospital.
She gives me one stern look and says: "Lady, you are gonna have to calm down, really".