"Change is good".

I heard a guy say today.

sometimes I agree, and other moments I think it's a crock.

I think everything is much like a crock these days.

everything except the fact that we are 2.5 games behind Boston in the AL East Division.

everything else falls in crock territory.

*******

I started Pilates again this week. My whole body is completely sore. My arms hurt, my butt, my legs...but no pain no gain, right???? My goal is to lose 10 pounds before X-mas...not a difficult goal....from 126 to 116 is not bad at all.

A whole new me is coming for 2008. Suckas Beware..

I'm doing this for myself. I wanna feel better, I wanna fit into itsy bitsy bikini's and not feel so self conscious about my looks. I've never been one to really give a crap...but lately I've been rocking the sweat pants and the baseball caps too hard....I think it's time for a makeover...

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In other news...and no, I don't care who happens to read this....things are kind of shaky on the relationship front.

something is just sooo off.

I think it has to do with EGOS.

Big HIS AND HERS MATCHING EGOS.

It's hard keeping up with the demands of a relationship. It's hard trying to comply and be nice and keep my trap shut and not jump into all sorts of conclusions.

things just suck big time.

and sometimes you just wanna tell it all to just 'eff off..ya' know? like : 'you don't need this crap...'

in this case change would be good.

If of course, you don't happen to love the other person. Which in this case, is not the case.

I love True.

It's just so effin' hard trying to get along with him at times....

is it just me? or are there times where you wanna bash your significant other's head in??? Tell me it isn't just me...

we are, as the pastors would say...a marriage in training...and these past few weeks this training has sucked.

Because of our busy fall schedule's..we've been not seeing each other as regularly...meaning not every single day, all day.

it's given me time to think...excersise..try to pray...and try hard to test my will and not eat the snicker's bar that is in my fridge.

::sigh::

my arms are sore and my head hurts...and our relationship takes a toll on me sometimes.

I can't even begin to think about the upcoming holidays, how to split up between families AND wedding plans...

not that there are any wedding plans as of right now.

no ring. no plans.

that much I'm sure.

right now I prefer the slow route to this whole getting married thing.

I know I've been rambling off and on about this whole ordeal and I'm beginning to sound on the tad bi-polar side, one day I'm amped, on day I'm having iceberg feet.

it's the unmarypoppins in me that tells me to take it easy to avoid making further mistakes.

I'm trusting the U.M.P (Un Mary Poppins) for the time being.

***********
Many have wondered about the wheareabouts of the Empress...well she is still alive.

She is working far far away..so our infamous Lunch Sessions are over for now. I have not seen her in months, though she lives a mere 10 minutes away from my own pad. Our conflict of schedule's has made it difficult for me to stop by. I am a sucky friend. I know.

She has a boyfriend. Yes, a boyfriend. I have not met him, but she says he is a really nice guy. For his sake, I hope he is....he doesn't wanna get on my bad side, especially with my state of mind these days.

She invited me over Monday because this lady who sells shoes stops by her house to sell her some....Miss C has too much homework, which happened to be a good thing...Lord knows I can't afford anymore shoes right now.

But, we talk daily on MSN....and yesterday we had a picture exchange fest...to see who could exchange more absurd, ridiculous pictures...none of ourselves..just random pictures to make fun of...

I was feeling a tad snarky....sue me..

She has been kind to lend an ear during these past few hard days...and her piece of advice is always priceless..."You always have me, gossip magazines and bad pictures".

::clinks glass::

your damn right.