"Here's your present, put it under the tree!"

I immediately shake the box True has handed me.

"Don't shake it and don't cheat. You can't open it till Christmas".

It was a rectangular box with a huge bow. The bows that the people at the Walgreens gift wrapping station make. The gift station that wraps up perfumes.

"You didn't get me another perfume? did ya?"

"Um...maybe".

"Maybe!!?? I told you NO perfumes. I have zillions of little bottles on my dresser. I don't need, I don't want another perfume".

He looks dissapointed.

"But, I didn't know what else to get you".

"But, why on earth did you ask for suggestions??!! I told you cd's, dvd's, new covers for my van, shoes...but not ANOTHER PERFUME!".

True had given me perfume for my Birthday and then for Valentine's he bought me, not one, but 4 perfumes.

Vietnam also gives me perfume for Christmas.

If I get another Eau de Toilet I might just go to the toilet.

"But...but I think you just might like this perfume!"

"No, No, No". I put my head down on the bed. I start to whine.

"Take it back...if it's a perfume, take it back...in fact, if it's a perfume you aren't getting your gift".

"What???!!...ok, ok, ok, I lied. It's not a perfume".

"It isn't?"

"No."

"But it looks like a perfume box, with a perfume bow".

He chuckles.

I make him swear to God it's not a perfume.

He crosses his legs.

Swears it isn't.

Santa is a very cruel man and if it is a Perfume I'm officially banning the Holidays.


Do you have a gift you hate to get?