Let me ramble.
Bare with me.
Out of Place.
I've been feeling like this for the past few days.
How can this be so, you ask?
Just a few weeks ago I was oozing with love, happiness, joy, and peace.
I am stil in love. I'm still happy. I still feel joy.
I kind of still feel peace.
I can't exactly pinpoint what is wrong.
But I'll tell you this:
I feel out of place.
Sometimes I think I think too much.
Sometimes I think I am not ready for some stuff.
But ready for so much more.
I feel like I am ready for change.
But scared of it.
I think I can handle it all.
But sometimes I think I shouldn't.
And I feel out of place. I feel I am trying too hard. I am afraid.
Of what?
Maybe losing myself. Whatever is left of if anyways. I am scared of losing my identity, whatever it may tbe. I cannot take that risk. My identity is all I have left.
Don't I wish that it could all be so simple?
Yep.
Empress' take:
"Snap out of it".
She's right.
I need to snap out of it.
And re-focus.
I need some rest, some sleep, some quiet, some enlightment...sans Miss C. I need to connect with my peers and re-connect with myself, since I sometimes forget who I am.
Don't we all.
I need to re-structure my game plan, because I knew days like these were only a hop, skip and jump away, before they began to loom.
I need to carve out a niche for myself so that I don't feel out of place, because I already have my own.
***
Taken from Dilbert...
"I plan to make bumper stickers for pedestrians that say: How am I walking?, call 1-800 Blah Blah Blah...if you call that number and report people, they'll never again be allowed to purchase shoes. The best part about hating people is that I never run out of great ideas".
Amen. to. dat.