From the mouth of babes....ahem..I mean, parents...
I’m posting today, thursday, because I will not be in the office tomorrow. Miss C has, finally, an evaluation, regarding her speech therapy. So I’ll be out and about...and decided to get this done tonight....So, I’ll add....
Since it's been a ‘slow’ week...
Well really it hasn’t been a slow week, but I’m under an oath of supersecrecy and I can’t disclose any information for now, so it's a ::wink wink:: slow week.
So I’ve been jotting down wonderful phrases my parents have oozed out in very odd and random moments during our evenings together.
Bare in mind, the things that come out of these two people are very very astonishing...so my Friday’s Four is the “From the mouth of babes...ahem... parents” edition...
1. When my mom gave Miss C a toy for going potty: She gave her a lil’ small martian and said:
“Look Miss C!! It’s a superterrestrial being!!”
“Mom...ahem..you said it wrong...”
“She’s so dumb..it’s not being..it's alien” dad
“Actually dad, what she said wrong was superterrestrial...it’s extraterrestrial”
My parents discovering the politically correct term to address an alien.
2. “You know this family resembles the stingrays...You know the stingrays that killed Steve Irwing. They look so nice and friendly. They flap their little wings. (She actually flapped her arms for an added effect), But deep down inside they are bad motherfuckers.”
My mom’s take on our family.
3. “What is this?” Dad
“Your tortilla” Mom
“What is it for? To eat it?” Dad
“No, dumbass to use it as shaving cream”
My dad, upon discovering that for all these years, those tortillas were meant to be eaten.
4. “Have you seen my Alka-Seltzer?” Mom
“No. I drank the last one”. Dad
“They were mine...You weren’t supposed to take them!”. Mom
“What did you want me to do, I was under attack by electronic diarrhea”
Technology has gotten very advanced. Soon we will be able to download it from Itunes.
Well folks...what are some of your memorable phrases of the week? Do share?
My plans for this weekend....nothing yet. Well, actually I got invited to another ::rolls eyes:: kiddie party. Haven’t I had enough?? I went to one last week. Another one this Saturday and another one in two weeks.
::stomps foot on ground::
I’m giddy. But not Birthday Party giddy.
So spare me the pain and ‘lose’ my invitation. We will surely not be missed.
I do have in my head some fantasy plans, which I can’t disclose as well. Yes, I know. I’m a prick. But I can’t say. Not yet anyway. Very supersticious person. Things can get easily jinxed. So I only told ONE person. That one person being Empress and she has also been sworn to secrecy. So don’t even try emailing her or asking her on myspace.
It ain’t happening.
So I’m out.
Take care my peeps...
Today’s thought of the day: Bitchslapping is still allowed in some parts of the US. Don’t hesitate to bitchslap someone in need. It works wonders for many.