I've got like a zillion things to do, like pay my cell phone, buy father's day gifts, a graduation gift and my mom a b-day gift...

How many of these things have I actually done?

None.

Yes. Be shocked. I am an Obsessive Compulsive Procrastinator...

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Oh news flash: Boston lost last night...and we beat Cleveland...tsk tsk.. Thought I had forgotten about baseball, didn't ya?!

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Before I go to the subject at hand..I'd like to give a 'shout out' to "A".

"A" is going to be a college graduate tomorrow. He is going to join the work force as a Social Worker...He doesn't think it's such a big deal...But fuck..graduating College is a Big Deal & he has his son visitin' from Cali-forn-IA, to conmemorate the ocassion. So Congrats!! I have no doubts u'll make a great Social Worker...

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Yesterday there was rain..there was hellish traffic...I was late to pick up Miss C as always...so Dad volunteered to pick her up, so I wouldn't just shoot myself on the freeway.

So when I finally make it home, it's almost 7pm...and what is my daughter doing??

She is in the POOL...in this shitty chilly weather...
My mom let her in the pool..Nice...I mean catching a pnenomia isn't a big deal...really it isn't. I love it when she's sick. (Note the sarcastic undertone)

So anyway...my mom tells me that Miss C has been quite the 'shocker' this afternoon..So I ask:

"shocker??".

First she was watching Animal Planet and two animals were fighting and she said:

"Meeeraa...que pasa papá??!!"
Meaning: "Heeeey..what's up nigga??!!"

Then it seems like Miss C wanted to go in the pool while my mother was having dinner...My mom told her to wait..and Miss C, the ever-so-patient daughter looks at her and says:

"Garbage. Chicken in Garbage. Let's go."

Funny thing: How the FUCK did she know my mom was having chicken???!!

So my mom laughs it off..takes her to the pool but Miss C doesn't wanna put on her bathing suit...She thinks we live in a nude community and she's in Playa Ibiza...

My mom threatens her and throws her the bathing suit saying:

"No suit, no Pool Miss C".

Miss C sniffs the suit and replies:

"Eeewww...it's no good, smells like shit".

Gee...I wonder where she gets it from...