I took Miss C to see Monster's Inc on Ice, courtesy of The Empress, yesterday afternoon (Once again, thanx babes!!..u see The empress is Miss C's fairy Godmother..a very cool one indeed)...anyway..we get in, we are seated, right in the front part of the stage on the second floor, and Miss C is kinda of like edgy. Which as u all know, worries the sh*t out of me.

The show had already started. Mickey, Minnie and crew were out entertaining the crowd before the main event. Miss C is in shock and awe....but then as the Monster's Inc. show began, the lights went out, smoke started to appear, as Randal (aka, the horrible monster from the movie) comes out slithering to scare Boo (cute adorable lil girl, who is a dead ringer for Miss C, which by the way someone remarked as we were going in the show)...

Miss C who sat through the shitty fake "Barny"...starts wailing..."NOOOOOO...Let's gooooo...Let's goo now!!"..

And mommy is trying to control her wails and screams, and crying..."there there...it's ok..it's just make believe"..

But Miss C wasn't having it...
She eventually calms down and settles in to enjoy the first part of the show, only to wail here and there when the lights were low....

Then there was the intermission. I understand that the people who skate in these outfits are tired and need a break and the consession people have to rob ur money with the $3 a slice pizzas, but I would prefer that the show run all the way through..cuz as soon as the intermission began, Miss C shook her hands and said: "It's over, let's go"...

So once again, mom has to engage in oh-so humiliating behavior to make her laugh and want to stay..Dammit...we got in free !!! We're staying until the God forsaken fat lady sings...or whatever it is that ends the show, ends it.

When we go to these events, I am usually happy cuz Miss C never asks for anything, no food, no toys. I always carry snacks, but she is so into the show she never eats.
Yesterday, of course, she was the shit. She wanted Pizza, pizza u know she can't eat. She also wanted a toy. A spinning glowing stick...a spinning glowing $20 stick..that almost made me have a titty-attack when the guy is like "20 bucks lady"...WTF??
The glowing stick will be permanently attatched to her body, and will make special guest appearances in her Prom, wedding and labor. For 20 bucks, it's the least it can do.

Jeez.

On the bright side, Miss C was psyched with her glowing stick..and behaved very well for the rest of the show.

***

After a good 15 mintues waiting to get out of the parking lot of the Coliseum, due to stupid ass drivers making non existant 3rd and fourth lanes...I decided to take Miss C to eat. A friend and I decided to meet up and go eat together.

Let me make this a little clearer fo' u folk...it was a 'male' friend

I have friends, male friends too. But for me to go out with a male friend, and include Miss C in the pic is a lil odd for me...
This male friend is nice, cool. We've got lots of stuff in common and get along just nicely. I personally think he is a cool artist. We've been to lunch a few times and have had a nice time (hence, I am using the word 'nice' a zillion times, in lack of another word, similar to nice...if u think of any let me know)..

Anyway, we pull up in this drenching rain to eat with Miss C, who is at this point very chatfull and polite with The Artist and vice versa. So what happens as soon as we walk in the place:

BAM!!! My Ex's ex coworker, his wife and fam....

Yes, very awkward moment. very awkward indeed. I mean, it's technically no biggie, cuz we are divorced, but my paranoic ass starts thinking:

What if they don't know I'm divorced??!! What if they see me here with my friend and think I'm on some secret rendevouz with him and my daughter in tow...I am such a bitch and bad woman and mother, taking my daughter along to meet with another man...!!

"Hi...(having a sudden brain hemorrage, and forgetting everything including my color underwear)!, oh my!! how much ur daughter has grown.."

All this while my friend is asking me for the keys to my van, cuz I left the lights on...

And since I can't concentrate on both events simultaneously I feel the veins in my eyes slightly pop...

So we make very awkward chit chat..my friend comes back..I do a totally bang up job at introducing him...

We keep talking...my friend's in the line to order and I manage to tell The Fam about the Ex's accident and clearly press on the fact that: he is staying over at my house **hit hint** so I can help him, until he is better to go to his...

We say our goodbyes, I get in the line..we order we eat...we say our goodbyes..

So now i'm like, well I'm gonna have to tell my ex about this lunch thingy..I mean I don't have the obligation to, but I'd rather him hear it from me, than from other people...

So i get home, and trying to play out in my head, what's left of it, the conversation and how it will go...so i get upstairs and the ex greets me with:

"So, P. (the lil girl who was with the family) is big, isn't she?"

::Oh shit..they beat me to it...bastards::

For all u bloggers non-island...news travels on dial up, gossip on fiber optics..

I try to gain my composure and answer "yep..she is"...and walk away...I can't obviously talk about this now..cuz I'll probably have some kind of brain breakdown of some sort..

So after a while, when I regained my ability to speak and conjure thoughts I told him I had lunch with a friend...blah blah..
He asked a few questions, I answered...end of discussion...

I can now try to salvage what's left of my nails.

And change my underwear.